Understanding Normal
When looking at that large cohort you will find that both sides of the debate, to be generous, are from some perspective correct. The perspective that they defend is because of their limited experiences and affinities. Always a persons perspective is a fragment of reality. Most people falling in the range of normal have a pretty good grasp of reality, the first deviation at least a fragmented grasp of reality. Building “reality” is building a Composite reality composed of different perspectives. It is a skill that people of any utilitarian worth will always strive to achieve. If you are not striving to put together the fragments of truth to create a clearer picture of the composite reality you are the problem.
Avoiding Conflict
1: True conflicts among the truly rational is rare but common among those who are in the first, second and third deviation from normal specifically the religious, the rich and the egotistical, the ego needs to constantly strengthen itself in order to exist. The rich never have enough. The religious need to be the true vision, all others a threat. In order to avoid conflict, seek a number of perspectives, ignore the religious, the egotistical and the rich.
2: Disconnect from Monitored media, that’s social media, online games, gambling or videos, news feeds, most of the internet where cookies are used and TV. Read more, but not online. Learn to listen with your ears and not your mouth; to people with real experience in the issue troubling you. The incessant bombardment of images and data, the constant mining of your emotions and the custom crafting of messages to shape your personality has created a race of hyper-active, hyper-paranoid, hyper-ignorant B.O.R.G. (Bred on Redditt and Google). B.O.R.G. are willing to perform acts of conflict on command.
3: Thinking and listening are two different skills. You cannot do them in parallel. Establish that the message is not religious, egotistical or commercial if all come up no, then pay attention to what the other person is saying. The mind of the other person underneath the words is only visible if you listen. When you listen you are at the deepest level of understanding, you are communicating, you are in communion. You do not need to say anything other than thank you.
4: Sometimes a cuff is not a bad thing.
And this cuff was but to knock at your ear, and beseech listening.
William Shakespeare, The Taming of the Shrew (c. 1593-94), Act IV, scene 1, line 66.
Understanding Conflict
Interpersonal dramas, debates and differences are usually not evil done upon one or another, they are simply conflict where the participants lack the skill to resolve. On each side of the 68.27% of the normal distribution of any debate lies the 13.59% on both sides who get it partly wrong. This group is easily manipulated and can go either way. We should all be optimistic, hope exists for 95.45% of us. The 2.14% who get it really wrong and the 0.13% who you do not want to be on either side of a debate are sad, abnormal deviants. They need to be helped or institutionalized.
The normal’s (68.27%) and the first deviations (13.59% on both sides) are the most likely to possess the needed skills to resolve conflict. Ignoring the gibberish of the second and third order of deviants (2.14% and 0.13%on both sides)An astounding 95.45% of the population on any given issue in any given population is potentially statistically normal with at least a semblance of the skills needed to see multiple sides in a debate. Unfortunately where the tools of rationality are most needed based on a normal distribution is exactly at the extremes
When looking at that large cohort you will find that both sides of the debate, to be generous, are from some perspective correct. The perspective that they defend is because of their limited experiences and affinities. Always a persons perspective is a fragment of reality. Most people falling in the range of normal have a pretty good grasp of reality, the first deviation at least a fragmented grasp of reality. Building “reality” is building a Composite reality composed of different perspectives. It is a skill that people of any utilitarian worth will always strive to achieve. If you are not striving to put together the fragments of truth to create a clearer picture of the composite reality you are the problem.
Avoiding Conflict
1: True conflicts among the truly rational is rare but common among those who are in the first, second and third deviation from normal specifically the religious, the rich and the egotistical, the ego needs to constantly strengthen itself in order to exist. The rich never have enough. The religious need to be the true vision, all others a threat. In order to avoid conflict, seek a number of perspectives, ignore the religious, the egotistical and the rich.
2: Disconnect from Monitored media, that’s social media, online games, gambling or videos, news feeds, most of the internet where cookies are used and TV. Read more, but not online. Learn to listen with your ears and not your mouth; to people with real experience in the issue troubling you. The incessant bombardment of images and data, the constant mining of your emotions and the custom crafting of messages to shape your personality has created a race of hyper-active, hyper-paranoid, hyper-ignorant B.O.R.G. (Bred on Redditt and Google). B.O.R.G. are willing to perform acts of conflict on command.
3: Thinking and listening are two different skills. You cannot do them in parallel. Establish that the message is not religious, egotistical or commercial if all come up no, then pay attention to what the other person is saying. The mind of the other person underneath the words is only visible if you listen. When you listen you are at the deepest level of understanding, you are communicating, you are in communion. You do not need to say anything other than thank you.
4: Watch for constructive cuff; not a bad thing.
And this cuff was but to knock at your ear, and beseech listening.
William Shakespeare, The Taming of the Shrew (c. 1593-94), Act IV, scene 1, line 66.